It was Christmas 2002 and I was all alone in the plush hotel room inAmsterdam. Alone but not alone. Early that morning I had kissed my crying two year old Jenny good bye in Kostroma, Russia. There was no way that she could possibly understand my promises to come back and get her. There was no way to ease her pain of being taken away from me. The tears filled my eyes and threatened to overflow as I stepped into the Russian car and rode away to theMoscowairport to catch my flight toAmerica. I longed to hold her, to keep her with me but that was not the way of Russian adoption. My heart felt like it would break.
But it was Christmas. In a few hours I would see my ten year old daughter and I could hardly wait.
“I’ll be home on Christmas Day,” I had promised her again and again.
A few hours later my plane landed in Amsterdam and I was informed that due to weather conditions there were no planes taking off for the States. I would have to wait until tomorrow.
My heart felt heavier than my luggage as I walked alone the long hall to find my room.
“No way.” I kept replaying the words spoken to me so matter of factly.
Slowly I tried to let the words sink in before I called home.
“You won’t be home for Christmas, Mommy?” her voice choked over the phone. Tears of disappointment and longing trickled down my cheeks.
Tried as I might to explain I knew her pain and disappointment.
As I sat on the edge of the massive bed my heart reached to my one daughter inKostroma,Russiaand my other daughter inVirginia. Love reached across those miles as I prayed God’s nearness to them both.
And once more I felt His Presence as He assured me of His Love.
My Love keeps reaching.
You are never alone. I am with you.
My heart felt soothed as I rested in His Words that day.
Let them be your words today.
Wherever you are. Whatever your situation. He knows your need. And He Loves you with an indescribable Love.
He is with you. His Love keeps reaching.
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